wow it's almost august.

i wanted to write this emotionally filled post about how I am truly terrified about having my own classroom. And TRULY being the one in charge. Like for student teaching it was different because ultimately really what went one was my mentor's decision. But I just don't know what I want to do or I guess what is 'right' for me to do. I guess I just don't like this idea of being a novice teacher. I want to be an experience, talented teacher already...I think it's just that I hate failing, but that's the only way I'm gonna grow soo...

And on top of that I'm moving to Evanston, and I'm gonna be completely on my own. I guess it's just a big step, and I didn't think it would feel as big as it does. I mean I went to college for 4 years, pretty much away from home the whole time, I just thought it would be easier than it feels. but it's not. Being at home for like 2 months makes me miss that security even more, that support. And I know my parent's will still be supporting me, but in a different way (financially not as much, which I guess don't wanna really worry about and I prolly won't, until I see all those bills). And each day that gets closer to my move-in day, it hints me slightly more that these big steps are approaching.

and I mean, I miss college already, I can't really believe it's over. And it's not helping that I'm moving back to the place where I went to school. I knew this would happen. Of course graduation day I was really happy I was done. But now I realize, I met some amazing  people, had some amazing experiences, and I'm done with that, moving on this next step of teaching, and totally different life.

But although I'm truly scared of being a teacher, moving on my own, and missing college, I know in the end I'll be alright. And in about two months I'll be so busy, everything will be routine, and I'll have some amazing experiences that I'll be truly happy that I am where I am.......But until then I guess I just need to pray and focus my energies elsewhere........

Was that emotional enough????

Blah.
----------------------
Random.
This week was VBS at my church. Realized I'm so glad I'm teaching high schoolers. those 6,7,8 year olds. Nu-uh.Could not be me. I would slap one of those kids....for reals.
----------
Announcement of sorts
Having a Graduation/Going Away/Housewarming celebration. More so my mom is. I don't really care about the celebration I just want gifts/money............should be fun though. I have to do a 'powerpoint' but I think my mom meant slideshow. well at least that's what I plan on doing...hahaha I'm so lazy.

also this is my 299th post........it's taken me forever to get to this 300. next post is gonna be grand slash i'm totally lying because I don't even know when the next time I'm gonna post....and who says grand anymore? dang cuh...

here's a random picture of me after I graduated from Kindergarten.......

I wonder if I still have this certificate, my mom prolly does........hahaha.
alright that's it.

PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE