so I just realized my blog-aversary back in December, so it's been like 4 years now....
wowza.

anyhoos. I was just gonna update a bit.
I'm on Christmas break. and basically it's been awesome. sleeping in has definitely been the best part.
i'm gonna miss it next week when i'm back to the hustle and bustle.

but i'm guess i'm excited to get back in the classroom. do i want to? NO. but my life will return to something meaningful. so far over break though, i've been crossing things off my things-to-do-over-winter-break-that don't-involve-work-TO DO LIST. one which includes furnishing my apt. I have so much space....but things are coming together at least my living room which is koolio awesome. I feel like I live here more now...other than that I haven't crossed too many other things off my list cuz i'm lazy...but i'm alright with that...i rested for realz.....

back to school stuff now, gotta change my mindset. Flip the switch from lazy to productive-ish. Overall, teaching is better. i mean definitely looking back to the beginning I did alot of stuff classroom management wise that was wrong or more so I didn't even know what to do. there's so much stuff I feel like I'm fighting in classroom that could've been avoided completely in the beginning....and I feel like still discovering who I am as a teacher and how to make that come across to my students. Like I really don't know who Mr.A is. And how that's different from the person I am out of school.

But I know  that  I'll definitely be prepared for next year...setting up procedures and routines and defining the boundaries more strictly (or at least try to). But you know I love my students all of them, even though I feel like I do way to much for them. And truly I just want them all to succeed in my class. But I don't know if I always express that because I'm so lost/overwhelmed/tired.

I guess that would be one of my goal for the second half of the year...
I think I've definitely been self-centered, concentrating alot of myself in classroom....because I'm trying to learn how to live the adult life and how I am supposed to be a teacher (it's my first year and all)
but I defintiely need to put the focus back on the students, no matter what's going on with me. Think about what are they doing. Then based on their performance think  about how can I improve.

Another goal I think, would be around the mathematics...I don't know if I often show my excitement for the math. show them the cool stuff. Yeah I want them to be able to do stuff. solve certain problems graph this blah blah. But it would help to show the importance of mathematics things to me. whether that some interesting background or presenting in a real life context. I would just really like to change my students perception of mathematics. like it's so ridiculous how easily students give up on math and how for whatever they don't think they can be good at it...

I got like five million more goals pop in my mind as I'm writing this..parents, motivation, failing students....I can just do alot better. and I know I still got a long way to go. I'm just glad it's better. Am I still as happy as I thought I would be? No. But it's better. my students like/respect for the most. And  I know they all want to learn. I need to help them get there  better-er..

one day I'll be effective. one day.

here's a picture I took of my dog Buster.
He was scaring the crap outta me today...

that's it.
PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE!

I'm finally updating

Guess because now I feel I have time, and plus I'm kinda bored actually, well in addition to procrastination but it'll all get done tomorrow.

First of all this is my 300th post. Woot! (this has taken forever......). Yeah I don't know when my next posts will be, but whateves....it's cool.


TWO. blogger has changed incredibly much, but hey that happens all the time with this social networking thing.....


3) this will probably be a rambling of sorts, cuz I'm just typing as I go and stuff..


#4 Teaching is a lot of work. Hardest thing I've ever done in my life. and honestly I'm not enjoying it as much as I thought I would. Maybe because I'm just focusing too much on the negative stuff. I don't know I just want it to be better already.


V. But my students are great. I just want them to learn. And that's not happening with everyone.... But they provide me with plenty of laughter and amusement. They definitely give my life meaning, definitely can see my purpose. just wish it was easier i suppose. Yet I realize that mathematics, at least the mathematics I teach is not really my passion. I definitely like math, but not as much as I use to. And I think it's because I don't see as much usefulness for it out-of-school context. Again I'm talking about the mathematics I teach. (sigh)

F. It also made me realize how much I LOVE music...I love singing (duh) and listening to music is so awesome.  I love listening for small inflection or changes, and things that are slightly out of tune. I can't really describe it, but I love it...

Six.  I need to go to church more often/ find a church home. Need it. It's weird being an adult, and having to officialize (making up words) so many things, like what I believe in religious, my (non-existent) political views/voting, paying bills, spending habits, food and shopping. Alot of stuff was based on what my parents did, and now on my own I now have the decision to do WHATEVER, and that's what scary to me because I don't know what to do I suppose....

Neves. I don't like being an adult. It's hard. I just think my life is tough in general, cuz I'm learning to rely on myself, which is usually is alright until I don't want to do anything. (which often happens on the weekend) so basically my life consist of nothingness (besides teaching), which makes adulthood seem awfully boring...eh.


ATE. My birthday is coming up soon. 23. I want to do something AWESOME. like drink. with friends in my apartment.  


9. My apartment is still pretty bare. I haven't had the time (more so the will) to go out and buy stuff. I'm slowly getting there though ( I got a rug!). Hopefully by the end of the year ( calendar year I mean) I'll have my living looking pretty nice. Hopefully....


!*. this is the last one. I don't know the next time I'll update. Hopefully before the year is over. This was fun. random updates  about stuff in my life. I could probably write more, but then this would lbe the post that never ends. 


- Also: Thanksgiving was fun. Ate tons, went back to K3. Church and Family. I miss it. uhhh yeah.

(random picture why not....hahaha...chicken and watermelon...which interestingly bring up a story. my parents came to visit me in October. and basically we ate chicken and watermelon. so stereotypical Ikr???)

until next time
PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE!

wow it's almost august.

i wanted to write this emotionally filled post about how I am truly terrified about having my own classroom. And TRULY being the one in charge. Like for student teaching it was different because ultimately really what went one was my mentor's decision. But I just don't know what I want to do or I guess what is 'right' for me to do. I guess I just don't like this idea of being a novice teacher. I want to be an experience, talented teacher already...I think it's just that I hate failing, but that's the only way I'm gonna grow soo...

And on top of that I'm moving to Evanston, and I'm gonna be completely on my own. I guess it's just a big step, and I didn't think it would feel as big as it does. I mean I went to college for 4 years, pretty much away from home the whole time, I just thought it would be easier than it feels. but it's not. Being at home for like 2 months makes me miss that security even more, that support. And I know my parent's will still be supporting me, but in a different way (financially not as much, which I guess don't wanna really worry about and I prolly won't, until I see all those bills). And each day that gets closer to my move-in day, it hints me slightly more that these big steps are approaching.

and I mean, I miss college already, I can't really believe it's over. And it's not helping that I'm moving back to the place where I went to school. I knew this would happen. Of course graduation day I was really happy I was done. But now I realize, I met some amazing  people, had some amazing experiences, and I'm done with that, moving on this next step of teaching, and totally different life.

But although I'm truly scared of being a teacher, moving on my own, and missing college, I know in the end I'll be alright. And in about two months I'll be so busy, everything will be routine, and I'll have some amazing experiences that I'll be truly happy that I am where I am.......But until then I guess I just need to pray and focus my energies elsewhere........

Was that emotional enough????

Blah.
----------------------
Random.
This week was VBS at my church. Realized I'm so glad I'm teaching high schoolers. those 6,7,8 year olds. Nu-uh.Could not be me. I would slap one of those kids....for reals.
----------
Announcement of sorts
Having a Graduation/Going Away/Housewarming celebration. More so my mom is. I don't really care about the celebration I just want gifts/money............should be fun though. I have to do a 'powerpoint' but I think my mom meant slideshow. well at least that's what I plan on doing...hahaha I'm so lazy.

also this is my 299th post........it's taken me forever to get to this 300. next post is gonna be grand slash i'm totally lying because I don't even know when the next time I'm gonna post....and who says grand anymore? dang cuh...

here's a random picture of me after I graduated from Kindergarten.......

I wonder if I still have this certificate, my mom prolly does........hahaha.
alright that's it.

PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE

Been home [a little more than] a week.

And it's weird.
Because I have that feeling like I would over a spring/winter break......I'll get back to Evanston soon enough (which is still true in this instance) but it's gonna be in a total different way.

 I'll be living in actual place of my own (the search for that is still ongoing and actual quite stressful, how I would love to play over $1000 for a 1 bedroom, I don't know if it's really worth it, esp since I have loans to payoff.......Do I want to live in Evanston or Chicago?....I just don't know, because I've never done this before...so really unsure but I'll figure something out, I'll keep you updated)

But really I have that feeling like I'm tired of being in K3 and that I'll be heading back to Evanston soon to hangout with friends and get ready for classes, but that defintiely's not happening..
And really I do not like being home.
One, I feel like there's nothing to do/I don't want to do anything
Two, No one is here
Three, family is family, but annoying after awhile, esp parents, its like stop telling me what to do, I'm not a teenage anymore, they don't understand that though.

Only a month left though, I'm sure I'll miss K3, but really looking forward to things to come.
Like sometimes I forget that I already have a job, because I literally have nothing to do, but there are moments of enlightenment when I'm like 'wait I have my own classroom, and students, and getting actual money for it'. It's a really great feeling....

But in the meantime, I need to find stuff to do.
yeah.
Random PIcture time. 

that baby is so cute...and I would totally say the same thing/have the same facial expression if I was with Obama.

Random Factoid.

Did you know?A shrimp's heart is located in its head.


Another random picture (just cuz I felt like it)

PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE!!!

Rambling about Book (yes a book)

ETHS gave me this book that I actually read (and it made me want to read more, for reals)

basically it talks about how there's two mindsets that us humans live in. fixed mindset and the growth mindset. In terms of intelligence (and basically any other facet of human existence it seems), people with fixed mindset basically see themselves as really smart or stupid. Basically in this mindset, you avoid challenging things in fear of failure, and when you do fail, you view yourself as stupid. Basically you put in no effort because you are already smart. Success is measured by being smart and failure not. In the growth mindset, you basically recognize your deficiences and try to build those up. When you fail, you learn from them. Success is measured by learning, you fail when you don't learn anything. People with this mindset like challenging things because they grow from it.

I LOVE this book. Basically because it really affects your life because I think it challenges you to evaluate your own mindset, in different areas of your life. I think for most of my life I have been in the fixed mindset as far as intelligence, I smart, I'm good at math, I'm good at this or that. I thought all of these things were inherent, and they very may well be, but now I realized it was more because of the effort and the time I put with learning that allowed me to become smarter, or greater at this or that. 

I realized a turning point for me, when I made the transition from a less fixed mindset to a growth mindset in the area of mathematics was in last fall. I was taking this Probability course, and I'd never considered myself good at Probability, it was just always really difficult for me. And this definitely showed in the beginning of the course. I was not doing that well on quizzes and test. And I just didn't understand what was wrong, why couldn't I get it. Too the say the most I felt really really stupid, especially in this class everyone else was doing considerably well. Eventually putting in effort, reaching out to the Professor and TA's, working with other students in the class, I did start doing better in the course. And came out with a B, instead of C which I thought I was. I realized now I had to grow because I didn't know anything about Probability. And as I did better definitely my confidence in the course grew. It's all about your mindset. 

The great things is I think it can be applied to everything in life, especially the spiritual side. As a Christian, I think sometimes its hard to change your ways. You figure God made me this way, then this is what he want me to be, and that I can't get better. But it's all about your mindset, you have to take on this growth mindset, that I can be what God wants me to be, even though I may not be there now, but I'm getting there. So I think that's really great. This book often reminded of this scripture Romans 12: 2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. You have to renew your mind, change your mindset, which is all the book is calling for you to do. 

But what I'm really excited about is how I'm going to implement this theory in my classroom. Because I definitely think specifically with mathematics, students will view it as something I inherently wrong with them that they can't do the mathematics. Or that they are really good at, so they don't need to do the problems, more so they don't want to because fear of failure. They will be stuck in the fixed mindset. And one of my upcoming goals, will be to change their mindset. I want to teach them that they can actually grow and learn mathematics. Nothing is hindering them but themselves. Euclid, and Pythagoras were humans just like you, they had a brain. All you have to do is work yours. So I recommend anyone whose everyone to just read this so they become knowledgeable of their mindset.  

I really think this book is life-changing. It's really how you define success I  think in the end. And with a growth mindset you can always be successful. 

PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE!

Last day in may.

Um, Today's the last day in may. tomorrow is June 1st, but I'm sure you know that.

This serves as important to me because that means there are 17 days left in my collegiate life.
Graduation (and real life) shall soon be here. and although I will be really happy to be done with classes
and assignments, problems sets, papers, lectures, discussion sections, office hours, grades, I'll miss everything that  Northwestern as offered me, the people, the experiences, they were truly amazing. This was really the greatest time of my life, and I hope it only gets better from here. It has to.

But only about four (or five) things stand in my way until that glorious day:
Philosophy assignment Due tomorrow
Philosophy of Ed Paper Due Monday
Reading in Content Area due Thursday
Math Paper (yeah I know) due Wednesday next week
Math final (may or may not have to take) also next Wednesday...

But good thing I'll be done with classes on Thursday so that will be a MAJOR milestone as well.

The future looks bright, i mean my life is totally ahead of me. And I hope it's ready, cuz I'm not (haha).           But I will be in time. Yeah I'm scared and nervous about how things are going to turn out at work, living on my own, bills and loans and stuff. I feel like I shouldn't be that worried because it gonna work out. I'm just realizing those days dependence and kinda-sorta dependence that college gave are winding down. I can do it though. so I'm not that discouraged....

......besides me being worried about the future and graduation and such,

I had my last Dillo Day, it was great. Not as thrown as last year, I actually remembered stuff. Bad thing I saw some of my students from Evanston, which  totally kinda ruined my mood, but I think it's all good...I had a great day..

I wanted to babble on some more, but  I just don't feel like typing no more. But I think I'm definitely going to keep a blog/records of my first year of teaching, either here or on my tumblr, which ever easier for me to do or I feel like is necessary, but that's far from now.....

so I'll be busy getting at those four/five things. Going home this weekend, which I haven't been to all quarter, I just didn't want to, but it should be fun to see the Fam.

bam.
that's it.
I'll give a random picture...just cuhz

hilarious

PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE!!!

sooo... I ramble

hey what up world
just had a nice 30 mins+ walk to kemper.
i guess i like long walks (not necessilarly on the beach though)
but it was cool.

I how was just thinking how many times am I gonna get to do this before I graduate?
it brought me back to freshman year, when I would walk from PARC to Sargent all de time.
And I think about that person back then, and the person I am now.
And it's like wow so much as changed like since then
Like, who was I back then?
Where was I going? What was I doing? (idk)
But it's cool to be older, wiser, a lil' maturer (is that a word?)

any hoo longs walks are nice. 
-----------

first week of classes.
it's weird being the student again. actually it's not weird. I totally hate it. urgh. Like I'm bored instantly. but my last classes should be interesting.

Math 104. Basically playing games all day e'reday. But so much work.
Philosophy of Ed. Gonna get on my nerves. like my last one. But this one I HAVE to take.
Reading in Content Area. Hoping to learn some strategies to teach literacy in classroom, probably most practical one. AND I DON't even have to take it.

Besides that I'm chillin. I'm game for doing anything and everything, BUT school work....
Random thought: I need to really be working on my DP (digital portfolio) right now instead of typing this.

Another random thought: Today's April Fools Day. Yeah.
-------------
Real life is scary. I don't wanna grow up. I wanna stay home and bake cookies with my mama. And be a Toys r us kids. And wear pigtails. And eat ice cream. uhhhh.
But such is the time. So I have nothing but to be ready. So I say here it goes....
------------
Speaking of real life, I  had a job interview at ETHS on Wednesday.
Things went well. It would be nice if I get it. Don't find out until 2-3 weeks from now.
So there it goes.
-----------
Is you okay? Is you? Good, cuz I want to know!
-GloZell
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Random Picture?
Sure.

(can't see it? click here)
This is why you don't go to McRonald's. Then you can see stuff like this....

That's it
PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE!

so it's been a month....

since I update last. Exactly a month, btw. 
And to say the least, i've been busy. with school work, classes , my practicum at ETHS, NCE, NUMB, work, and just general resting hanging time, this blog was definitely pushed to back of thing on my list of to do.

not to mention my laptop charger almost caught on fire, like seriously dude i was scared I was gonna burn the dorm down. anyhoo I was too lazy/cheap to buy a new one, until I got one for like 4 bucks (7 total) off that good Amazon dot com. so let's just say we back in business, for a least some time.

it's also sad to think that my last Fall quarter at Northwestern is coming to an end. by all means, I'm excited, but parting is such sweet sorrow (SHAKESPEARE!) but I realized it's also a great jubilee. Like from this quarter I've realized one thing: College is stupid. Like I hate it. I hate having to worry about these stupid assignments, when in real life I won't have to write paper or anything. I'll have to write lessons, which I also hate.....uhhhh i don't know anymore.....

I  mean, I just want to figure out what I'm doing with my life, and by that where I'm going to teach when I graduate, when I figure out that I'll be so much happier about life, and it'll give me a goal. Because without goals, life is like a box of chocolates like drifting on the ocean on a piece of ice, eventually that ice will melt and you will sink and die because you can swim. so yeah.

yo that's was like real deep (Heavy?)

In other news. I'm getting old, Officially. On monday I'll be 22, which makes feel real old, I don't know why. I guess this is point where I become an adult. and I guess it's kinda is true. I mean I'm bout to start real life. I got my license, I got a car! (yeah that's news I got a car over thanksgiving break. 2001 Honda Civic, Green, Two Door. Amazing.) I mean I don't want to grow up, but I think it'll be kinda fun/interesting to be completely independent and stuff.

I don't know what else to talk about.
 Um
Band Banquet this Saturday, I get to say goodbye to a great (but crazy) organization. I'm really happy to be done with Band, specifically this quarter it was just another thing on my long list of craptastic-ness. I'm just glad I did it all four years. Even through all the struggles, and the times I didn't want to be there, I really enjoyed being apart of NUMB. I'll miss it. But at least after the Bowl game, I won't have to wear that uniform ever, ever again.

Also, something I learned in the past month:  Teaching is mad hard yo. Like for reals,  I seriously I think it's one of the hardest profession in the world. There's so much to go into to teach high school students, to motivate them. I think besides teaching students math, I really just want to inspire, and just make learning/thinking something kool to do. But hopefully I can do a whole nother post, sometime in the future, more dedicated to my thoughts teaching, because seriously it's gonna become my life real soon. And the world should know how I feel.

um that's really all I have to say now. I might do a youtube mania or something random. Idk depends on how I feel.

Well, I'm off to celebrate something with friends.
Wow I've missed this blog.
PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE!!!!

Bloggy McBlog Blog Blogerstein

wow. guess i don't like to update it anymore
"it's just because i'm so busy"
"it's because i'm so lazy"

well not really, i guess it's more because voicing my opinion about random things don't really appease me anymore as much as they used to.....or is it because I really have nothing interesting to talk about in my life......or is it because I do I have stuff I want to share, but I don't want to share??.......

whatever the reason, the number of my updations are going down in comparison to a year from now (for instance, this is the second one for the month of september)
and since skool starts in 2 days, there's not telling whats gonna happen with this here blog...

but speaking of school,
classes start on Tuesday, but I just realized I won't actually have class until Wednesday  : ) . But on Tuesday I'll be going to ETHS to start my observation, so basically I'll be in class, just not a college one. I'm really looking forward to it. I don't really know what to expect, I mean I have some clue, but what will the students be like? How will my mentor teacher's style differ from my ever-developing style? How will this change my life and my career? Will it even be interesting or will I be bored outta my mind sitting in a high school class?? Idk.  but we'll see....

okay that's kinda it.
Random Picture Time?!
(I haven't done that in awhile)

TOO FAR. smh.

that tis all
PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE!!!

Movie Rambling

Way to update, Adrian! Yeah I've been kinda neglectful, but who cares this is my blog. 

Anyways this is just about some movies I watched this summer. 

my GS (guardian spirit, sorta like a secret santa for the summer with the Christmas aspect) got me two movies.
Wedding Crashers

I've seen this movie once, but it's cool to own it, and I didn't even have to pay for it. Vince Vaughn is SO Hilarious in this movie. it's pretty great.

Seven

I saw this film probably about 5, 10, 15 idk  years ago. Stars Morgan Freeman and Brad Pitt, who are detectives trying to solve a case involving the seven deadly sins, it's pretty good thriller, mystery movie. Kudos to my GS!


I also finally saw Inception,


pretty trippy movie, and amazing. You totally gotta pay attention,  I still missed some stuff even though I swear I was paying attention. I saw this move with some Breakthrough Staff members. It was pretty kool, though  it reminds me so much of  The Prestige (one of my favorite movies), with like all the different scenarios happening simultaneously,  which is funny  because both of those movies were made by Christopher Nolan, who also did Black Night, so that tells you something right there.

that tis all.
PEACE & CHICKEN GREASE!!